So you found nothing?
If you have tried to search online for the reasons behind worrying then i am pretty sure that your search ended in vain. Yes you might have found a useful page or two but i am pretty sure that you are still confused as a result of the fact that even those useful pages don't provide a direct and clear explanation to the worrying problem.
The sad thing about the internet is that even some professional websites copy from the few first results, which are sometimes anything but useful, and as a result you might end up with 10 pages that say the exact useless thing.
But don't worry :)
After reading this article i promise you that you will perfectly understand worrying.
The real reasons behind worrying
So why do we worry about certain things?
- 1) Because you care: First of all we only worry about the things that matter to us very much. Worrying is a direct message sent from your mind telling you that something really matters. This is why you might worry about some things but never worry about others.
- 2) To feel in control: If you are a control freak or if you can't handle uncertainty then you will certainly worry whenever you feel that you lost that control. But why? Simply because by worrying your mind let's you think that you are more in control simply because your eyes are now on the issue. See how the desire to be in control promotes worrying
- 3) The worst case is unbearable: People who worry often usually think about the worst case. In such a case the fact the worst case seems unbearable is the reason so many people keep worrying. See The ultimate soloution to end worrying
- 4) You are not doing your homework: In some cases people worry because they know that they haven't done enough to deal with that issue that matters to them. In such a case the minds of those people might punish them by keeping them worried until they take serious actions. See also the ultimate soloution to all life problems
- 5) Your subconscious mind doesn't like your plan: In a previous article about worrying i said that if your subconscious mind wasn't convinced with the plan you are following then certainly it will keep worrying. In such a case the purpose of the worrying is to motivate you to change the plan
- 6) Perception errors: In so many cases people worry about things that never happen as a result of seeing reality in a wrong way. Perception errors can let you see things incorrectly, over estimate dangers and think of possibilities that are very less likely to happen. See how perception affects the behaviour
- 7) To show care: sometimes you might worry as a result of your unconscious mind's desire to show that you care. A mother for example could worry about her kids all the time just because on the unconscious level she wants to feel that she loves them
- 8) You are consciously trying to deal with an unconscious problem: When you try to handle worrying using your conscious mind in such a way that it goes against the desires of your subconscious mind then certainly your worrying isn't going to go away. A popular example is trying to calm yourself down by telling yourself that you shouldn't worry.
- 9) Unconscious guilt: Some people worry because deep in their subconscious minds they feel guilty. That guilt might promote thoughts such as "i will have to pay for what i did" and as a result the person might end up worrying all the time
So are these are the possible reasons for worrying?
Of course no but this list should give you a good idea of how you should look at a worrying problem.
Why Generic advice never work
In my book, The ultimate guide to getting over depression i said that trying to solve emotional problems by doing generic things such as exercising, thinking positively or even taking medications can hardly work.
After all as you saw each worrying case can be totally different from the other and the key to dealing with your worrying problem is to understand it perfectly.
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